My view of this taxi was very much the way individuals experience communication in relationships.
Recently I was in the St. Thomas Virgin Islands. It was one of the stops on a 7 Day Cruise. Upon arrival, my wife and I wanted to go downtown to see what it was like. We were told that taking 
a taxi downtown would be the way to go.
I had an image of what a taxi would or should look like. I thought of a car or a mini-van as I was used to seeing back home in the United States. I kept looking for at least a vehicle of similar description.
I looked and looked and looked only to realize the taxi was right there before me all along. The problem: I was looking for something else. I didn’t see it until we were told to go to what looked to me like an open back truck with some seats.
A taxi? A taxi? Yes, it was.
We boarded from the sides and shared seats with about three or four other people and we were on our way to downtown St. Thomas.
Meaning Can Be Very Subjective
I was looking for an image that was created by my context. The image of what a taxi should be like, came from the understanding I had. This became the lens through which I looked.
How many times do we use the image we have been given or that which we have cultivated to interpret words or phrases used by others? Is it any wonder we encounter un-necessary conflicts with others, over words or phrases, that are misunderstood or misinterpreted.
I see this so often in relationships within the family and the workplace. We all have our meanings and images in our mind that somehow we mistakenly think everyone else have as well. We lack proper communication in relationships. Are you guilty of that?
What if we took the time to seek a better understanding of what others mean with the words or phrases used? What if we took the time to explain our meanings of certain words not assuming that everyone understood our meanings?
I believe if this was done, we would have less conflicts and better understanding of one another.
Let me illustrate:
A person in a relationship is feeling neglected; not having the affection from their significant other. How do they normally ask for affection?
They’ll complain, become mean, withdraw, become angry or show other negative behaviors. The more they do this, the more frustrated they become as their complaint goes even more unnoticed.
Is it that their significant other is uncaring? Maybe. But I would say from experience working with clients, the issue is more times than not, an unclear request.
You might be thinking, how clearer could one be. I would say … clearer.
What if he or she said, “I’m feeling lonely and when you put your arms around me I feel loved by you?” I believe that would be very clear what’s been said and now the other person have a better idea of what affection, or lack of it, means.
What I’ve heard when I make suggestions like these, is that, “no one talks like this.” To which, I say “you’re right. Is that why so many conflicts arise that could be avoided?”
Maybe, more people need to talk like this.
The way you understand “taxi” may not be the way another person understands it. By taking the time to explain, could make the difference between peace and conflict.
What’s your thoughts on this? Let me hear your thoughts in the comment section below.
