In this episode, you will discover three ways to reduce the power struggle in relationships – personal and professional relationship.
Sometimes we find ourselves in needless power struggles simply because of lacking understanding on the behaviors associated with power. Here are three of the many ways, that when understood and embraced, can significantly reduce the power struggle in relationships.
1. Power Exists In Every Relationship
When you talk, you are attempting to exert power over other people. Your immediate reaction to this statement might be, “No I’m not.” Before you adamantly disagree, would you agree that you are hoping that the person with whom you are speaking, understands you and / or acknowledges what you are saying?
If your answer is no, why are you then speaking?
On the other hand, if you answered yes, you are selling them an idea or a position. This puts you in the power position. By definition, being in a relationship means letting someone have some influence on you and you having influence on the other person.
2. Power is derived from the ability to meet someone else’s needs
If you are in the position to meet someone’s need, you have power. Even though to you it might not seem that way; for the mere fact that at that moment they are dependent on you-you are the power broker.
Being dependent may simply be for a basic need – water, food, clothing, transportation, a hug, etc. It’s not how big or small the need is that determines the power issue; it’s simply having a need that you are in a position to meet. The other persons life is made better for having that need met.
This ability to satisfy another person’s needs, represents the amount of power you have.
3. Power is negotiable and transferrable
Sometimes the reciprocity of needing something, can shift the power from one person to the other in a matter of minutes. For example: I might need my wife to tell me how wonderful a job I did landscaping the yard. At that moment, she is in the power seat; she has something I need.
On the other hand she might need me to reciprocate her acknowledgment with a hug. I have what she now needs. I’m in the power seat.
We transferred power within one transaction. This is how business and romantic partners can negotiate the shiftings of power.
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reduce the power struggle in relationships.
